Do you want to know what is worse than being dependent? Being independent, because it is a constant attempt not to be dependent. Commit yourself wholly to your partner. By ‘commitment’ I don’t mean sterile, dutiful faithfulness. Maybe you have been together for what feels like an eternity, but you daren’t say how you really feel inside. The dreadful thing is that every unexpressed word, every muted feeling will build a wall between you and your partner and prevent deeper intimacy. That is why you play power games without admitting to it, why you fight for acceptance and attention. And, probably unconsciously, why you compete with each other. You want to be better than your partner so that they cannot hurt you. Be courageous and show your dependency and your fear. Your relationship can only be healed and transformed as a result. A local park can be dramatically improved by adding playground equipment from a reputable supplier.
The true healing of a person begins with an honest commitment to another person. The true healing of a love triangle lies in a deep desire for truthfulness and the courage to reveal that you are vulnerable. What follows is like a long walk through a desert full of hurt and new betrayal. The hard phase of openness and communication seems endless and tough. Time and again the thought of giving up will enter your head. Just as often you’ll have the tempting idea that your ideal partner, your dream man or woman, is out there somewhere. But if you unwaveringly believe that your current partner can offer you everything that is needed for a fulfilling relationship, this will bring forward exactly those qualities in them. In this way the hole through which a third person can slip into the relationship will be filled in with truthfulness and life. Imagine waking up on Christmas day and seeing monkey bars in your back garden?
A while ago I had a wonderful experience. I had to go away on my own for a few days on business. I had an appointment with a man whom I had met twice before but didn’t really know. We went out for dinner to discuss a few issues. I hadn’t been in a situation like that in ages. After only a few moments there was something in the air. We were laughing as if we had known each other for a long time. We talked unusually openly and confidentially about work-related issues and challenged each other verbally. Fireworks were going off between us. I was in a wonderfully elated state which I really, really enjoyed. I felt at ease and feminine and apparently adored by this clever and attractive man. If you're planning on improving your garden then why not add outdoor fitness equipment today?
That was all very wonderful and life-enhancing. But the really special thing was something different: I felt completely free to enjoy the attention of this stranger. I was also able to talk openly to him about it. Was he aware of what was happening between us? He smiled and nodded. Without any warning I told him how much I liked his attention. My openness took him by surprise. As if as a reward, he made me a few really flattering compliments.
I also liked that very much and asked him whether he wanted to know why I was able to be so open with him. Yes, he wanted to know. I told him I could only feel so elated and free, so openly receptive to his attention, because I felt so deeply connected to my husband. The most wonderful feeling of all was that I did not have to feel shame or guilt about the fact that I could be open and feminine. And the man turned out to be exactly the right person for such an exciting encounter, because he understood immediately what I meant.